Being Met With Hate

Two years ago, Ren posted a video about being met with hate. He discussed the ways in which the Internet has not only expanded a person’s reach, but expanded the hate to which we are exposed. And he’s right. You can’t please anyone. And between you and me? If you’re not pissing someone off, you’re probably not being true to yourself.

Ren rejects the labels of left and right in relation to politics, but his core principles, the things he stands for, are never in doubt to those who are willing to really listen to what he’s saying. It’s a fine line to walk. One that allows him to reach a wider audience and appeal to people from all political and socio-economic backgrounds. But even so, Ren finds himself met with hate. He finds himself criticized for not choosing sides, or for being too far left, or too far right. If you’ve followed him on X for a while, you’ve seen that hate play out in real time as he’s attempted to defend his positions against brick walls masquerading as human beings.

These interactions beg the question: what is it about the Internet that makes people behave in ways they would likely never behave in person? Is it anonymity? Or the dissociation from the person with whom they are arguing? Something else? Why are people on the Internet such dicks?

In my opinion, the anonymity and dissociation are the two most significant factors that lead people to be dicks on the Internet. There’s a euphoria that comes with being able to say what you want without fear of repercussion. Without reprisal. We all have some pretty dark thoughts at times (don’t deny it), and it feels good to be able to put them out into the world. But expressing these thoughts without…well, thought, only results in more hate and more polarization.

Which leads me to my point. I want you to take a moment to think. Really think. Consider a time when you expressed hate towards another person on the Internet. Or, at the very least, when you’ve shut someone down without taking the time to understand their point of view. This is something anyone who has been on the Internet a number of years has done, despite our best intentions.

I want you to consider an alternate reality. One where you engaged with the person in good faith and heard them out. Maybe the result would be the same. After all, we all have our red lines. But maybe you could have come to an understanding. Not an agreement, per se, but a respectful acknowledgment that the other person’s beliefs, based on their experiences, are valid. Maybe you could have understood their perspective, even if we disagreed. Can you imagine such a reality? Is that a scenario you would be willing to entertain? Next time you disagree with someone on the Internet, do you think you will consider the other person’s point of view? I can’t speak for Ren because I am but a simple fan of his music and his philosophy. But I like to think this is what he is asking of us. All he asks is that we listen, really listen, to beliefs that run counter to our own. That we try to find common ground, because how else can we make the world a better pace? And so, I challenge you to open your minds. The next time you see something that makes you want to react, pause. Listen. Strip away the labels and try to find common ground. And if there is no common ground to be found, at least try to understand the person’s position. Empathize with them, even when it’s hard. Even when their beliefs are so far over your red lines that you could never accept them. At the very least, do not meet hate with hate. Meet it with compassion. With empathy. With any emotion that might cause the other person to pause. To think. To see beyond whatever arbitrary labels they’ve placed on you, and realize one simple truth: we are all human beings.